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From our Dog Quotes section

Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read. ~ Groucho Marx

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It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass. ~ Rodney Dangerfield

My dog is half pit-bull, half poodle. Not much of a watchdog, but a vicious gossip! ~  Craig Shoemaker

If you make a fool of yourself in front a dog, he will make a fool of himself, too. ~ Chuck Jones

What do dogs do on their day off? Can’t lie around – that’s their job! ~ George Carlin

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. ~ Robert Benchley

You can say any fool thing to a dog and the dog will just give you this look that says, ‘My GOSH, you’re RIGHT! I NEVER would’ve thought of that! ~ Dave Barry

Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun. ~ Groucho Marx

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The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. ~ Andy Rooney

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear. ~  Dave Barry

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